"Hey Society He's Suppose to take care of his kids!"

Why does Society in general put a man on such a high pedestal when they are single fathers taking care of there kids? Women have been doing that for centuries!

For instance, my neighbor was going on and on about some guy she knows who is such a great man because he is a single Father taking care of his kids. So I said, " Well I have been a single Mother taking care of my son on my own for 16yrs. and not once out of the 11yrs. you've known me have you praised me for that! So, why are you prasing him, just because he's a man?! He's a Father just like I'm a Mother your suppose to take care of your child/children."

Ok Love Muffins, Why do men get such praise for doing something they suppose to do in the 1st place? Have we become so conditioned to single Mothers taking care of there kids on there own that when a man does it, it's like a Miracle or something....LOL

Are there any of you Love Muffins who feel the same or can you understand where I'm coming from? Especially, if your a single parent or no someone who has gone through the same situation.

Tags: bscott, child, children, father, kids, love, mother, muffins, parent, single

▶ Reply to This

Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Dorothy on August 18, 2008 at 6:15pm: I say the SAME exact thing that you're saying...I don't play that mess! I don't give FREE praise. You're SUPPOSED to take care of your kids, so I'm not giving any praise unless you're doing something SPECIAL, not just providing them with food, shelter, and water...c'mon now, that's what you're supposed to do! NEXT!! :o); ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by HoneyDip on August 18, 2008 at 7:36pm: lol.... I don't play that mess either. I will tell someone how I feel if they come talking that BS to me that gets on my last nerve!; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by DESSALUVU aka DEEFAB on August 18, 2008 at 6:20pm: wtf? Men r supposed to take care of their kids, if they don 't , they a f n deadbeat; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by razegeneration on August 18, 2008 at 6:49pm: i completely agree, but you kinda answerred your own question

"Have we become so conditioned to single Mothers taking care of there kids on there own that when a man does it, it's like a Miracle or something....LOL"

exactly, there are SO many deadbeat dads who aren't even in their childs lives at all, there are SO many ppl who dont even KNOW who their dad is, so to see a MAN FINALLY stepping up to the plate, it really is almost like a miracle lol.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Mz. Deon A*K*A :::..phatFAB..::: on August 18, 2008 at 6:57pm: I agree w/you...'Y Give Sumone 'Credit' For Something That Should Be Done Anyway?!'...That's like my mom says about giving ppl money for their birthdays, "U already been born, y do I have to pay you for it?!'...My hat goes out to SINGLE parents...woman or man, who are raising their kids...The majority of society thinks it's good to see a single father...Women have been doing it forever & day, & will continue to do so...So, instead of giving as Dorothy said 'Free praise', do what you're suppose to do from the start, & everything will be OK.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Ms.NeeCee on August 18, 2008 at 8:56pm: Ok, this is where I get heated.I am a single mother of 3 so I definetly feel you on this one. I think that society and everyone else are conditioned to single mothers and these days it's normal. I feel it's the same double standard that it usually is when it comes to men vs. women! We get the negative and they get the positive. Which is BS. What makes it so different? That pisses me off. Just like when a man pays child support and sees his child 4 times a month(every other wknd)he acts as if he is being a father! and that is what society calls a father? I don't buy that shit. We have to be mothers 24/7 and that means actually being there not taking them to Mc Donald's and kiddie land and bringing them back home! We have to cook, clean, potty train, teach abc's, help with homework, discipline, wash clothes, take care of boo-boo's, to the dr, to the school,meet teachers, go to field trips, allowance, birthdays, christmas, and go to work and so, so, so much more in order to be a good mother, but your fucking dad of the year because you pay child support? Then you have to hear most men don't even do that! It's a double standard with most things. Sorry to sound like a feminist but been there done that. I think it's a good thing that he is taking care of his kid/s but it's nothing to get your panties wet about because that's his damn job!!!!!!!!; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by HoneyDip on August 18, 2008 at 9:12pm: Amen NeeCee.... Tell it like it TI is....; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Dorothy on August 19, 2008 at 4:04am: Preach tabernacle :o); ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by sLiCk on August 18, 2008 at 11:37pm: i can completely understand where u're coming from

i guess single father's are pretty rare that to see one who has stepped up to the plate is an "accomplishment" in some way. I mean i really can't recall situations where mother's run out on their children, jus the idea of that is kinda funny to me. A woman going thro all the pains of labor and then turns around and abandons her child.....i don't get it but that's juss my thoughts on it.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by HoneyDip on August 19, 2008 at 9:30pm: I totally agree with you Slick .... its so sad that being a Father to your child is so rare... and in some cases Slick there have been Mothers who have left there children with the Father its not common but it does happen.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Shawane on August 19, 2008 at 9:34pm: Exactly people have to undertsand well go through whatever and that makes us tronger, I get so pissed when straight me and people hate on other niggas or men especially gay men who help take care of the babies they created or women who have male companions who help them out...dont be upset be happy that this strong BLACK was able to raise her child or children to be doctors' or lawyers' while u were in jail and left HER A WOMEN...praise HER do not DEGRADE her; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by DaniFAB the Diva on August 20, 2008 at 5:26pm: Now I know my opinion may be in the minority on this one, but just hear me out. I think men and women are different types of creatures, that require different things out of life. Men are wired differently, and are motivated by other things that women usually don't understand. It's a misnomer that men are simple creatures and that women are complicated. When you don't understand men, they can be a a conudrum tied up in an inigma, just plain difficult. Let's be real, their are a lot of guys out there not doing their parts as parents. So if there is a guy out there willing to go against the grain and what their peers have to say regarding being a father, then I think he deserves a little bit of recognition. It's expected for a woman to take care of her children, unfortunately not so for men. I'm not saying its right, because its not. And if you need a few props for what you do as a father, then I'll be the bigger person and oblige. "You're such a good father" "You take care of your kids by yourself? Oh thats so amazing" See its not that hard. Okay the public stoning can begin....now!; ▶ Reply to This